http://laughingintherain.wordpress.com Just another WordPress.com weblog Mon, 14 Sep 2009 00:50:14 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.com/ http://s2.wp.com/i/buttonw-com.png http://laughingintherain.wordpress.com http://laughingintherain.wordpress.com/2009/09/14/weekends-that-hurt/ http://laughingintherain.wordpress.com/2009/09/14/weekends-that-hurt/#comments Mon, 14 Sep 2009 00:50:14 +0000 laughingintherain http://laughingintherain.wordpress.com/?p=6 ]]> I can’t say I love him, because I don’t!  I just want him to want me more than he wants her, I guess!  He texts and then tells me I am killing him.  Maybe if he considered for a minute not seeing him over my birthday weekend or being able to call when I feel like it hurts far worse than me killing him with my text message that basically is begging him to come see me.  I knew it when he first kissed me that I would be the one to lose in the end.  He isn’t mine, he never was.  He belongs to her and doesn’t have the courage to realize that he made a mistake and fix it!  Instead he calls me his therapy in those sinful night so few and far between.  I love the way he touches me, the way he tells me that I am beautiful, the first kiss we share each time, especially when he tells me to be patient!  I want to scream that I have waited three months or so, isn’t that really being patient enough.  So I cry empty tears, because after so many years of crying for love and dreams, the emptiness is painful and the silence is deafening.  Does he know?  I think so, yet I just long for him to want me and not even love me.  I long for him to fill the empty spaces where the depths of my soul has seeped to the surface and calls out his name in the cold moments of life’s longest hurting weekends,

]]> http://laughingintherain.wordpress.com/2009/09/14/weekends-that-hurt/feed/ 0 laughingintherain http://laughingintherain.wordpress.com/2009/08/30/hello-world/ http://laughingintherain.wordpress.com/2009/08/30/hello-world/#comments Sun, 30 Aug 2009 06:45:44 +0000 laughingintherain ]]> This is the day that reminds me how important it really is to follow your heart and do what you love.  It is the perpetual start of a new school year and as difficult as it is to write, going back to school each time makes my skin crawl.  I am a teacher for goodness sake!  I am supposed to love going back to school.  That is why I became a teacher, right?  So why does it cause me such frustration?  I can’t tolerate other teachers and I don’t think they all really care about the welfare of kids.  So I start each year with my back against a wall and fight my way out of the corner to try and reach the kids that others have destroyed in the process.  This day is so difficult for me to face each year!  Why do I stay?  Because, really, I don’t how to walk away!

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